








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 69 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 8 matches | 2,076 | |
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
278 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 593 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 168 | 28% |
| Smokes | 148 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 160 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 117 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $102,962 of utility $252 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 79 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | floatlikebutterflystinglikebee | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | d | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | Moll3 | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | STEVE | 33% | 3 |
| #5 | krawn | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | floatlikebutterflystinglikebee | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | d | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | Moll3 | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | STEVE | 33% | 3 |
| #5 | krawn | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d | 2 | 0.0138 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d | 42 | 0.29 | 1 min |
| #2 | floatlikebutterflystinglikebee | 23 | 0.31 | 1 min |
| #3 | krawn | 8 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #4 | Moll3 | 7 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #5 | STEVE | 4 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d | +9.15 | 95 | 77 |
| #2 | keppyᵠ-ᵠ | +3.12 | 87 | 64 |
| #3 | Moll3 | +2.59 | 85 | 66 |
| #4 | floatlikebutterflystinglikebee | +2.11 | 53 | 57 |
| #5 | krawn | +0.95 | 45 | 62 |





