








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1136 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 720 matches | ||
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




97 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11130 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 52,457 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 20254 | 39% |
| Smokes | 11313 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 11575 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 9315 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $829,861 of utility $44 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1569 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Subs | 57% | 58 |
| #2 | maceo | 56% | 102 |
| #3 | GANGSTALKER | 53% | 128 |
| #4 | BF | 52% | 148 |
| #5 | s9an | 51% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | BF | 52% | 148 |
| #5 | s9an | 51% | 134 |
| #6 | Kmatty | 50% | 231 |
| #7 | Cigar | 49% | 375 |
| #8 | rh | 47% | 245 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BF | 55 | 0.0172 |
| #2 | Cigar | 39 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | Kmatty | 34 | 0.0067 |
| #4 | rh | 18 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | s9an | 9 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cigar | 647 | 0.08 | 15 min |
| #2 | rh | 576 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| #3 | BF | 533 | 0.17 | 16 min |
| #4 | GANGSTALKER | 499 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #5 | s9an | 430 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kmatty | +3.04 | 74 | 45 |
| #2 | BF | +1.95 | 68 | 67 |
| #3 | m | +1.51 | 56 | 63 |
| #4 | maceo | +1.03 | 57 | 60 |
| #5 | s9an | +1.02 | 78 | 65 |





