








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 523 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 244 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 75 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5815 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,723 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5035 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4560 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4723 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5405 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,056,187 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 942 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | II Emmers II | 46% | 41 |
| #2 | BlaggyDeCat | 45% | 165 |
| #3 | cys | 39% | 142 |
| #4 | DUCKBOY | 34% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | II Emmers II | 46% | 41 |
| #2 | BlaggyDeCat | 45% | 165 |
| #3 | cys | 39% | 142 |
| #4 | DUCKBOY | 34% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DUCKBOY | 5 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | BlaggyDeCat | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | cys | 4 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cys | 277 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #2 | BlaggyDeCat | 216 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #3 | II Emmers II | 61 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | DUCKBOY | 40 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R4MpAgE | +0.78 | 69 | 66 |
| #2 | BlaggyDeCat | +0.61 | 54 | 58 |
| #3 | II Emmers II | +0.25 | 59 | 56 |
| #4 | DUCKBOY | -2.98 | 17 | 44 |
| #5 | cys | -4.74 | 19 | 54 |





