








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
566 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,049 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 292 | 14% |
| Smokes | 594 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 605 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 558 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $205,534 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RealblockHu$tler | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | Yunoc | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | Resh | 71% | 14 |
| #4 | SKAFDS | 70% | 10 |
| #5 | ChrisS | 58% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SKAFDS | 5 | 0.0254 |
| #2 | Bubbleking_Basti | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Benny | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | NoReturns | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Noname | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NoReturns | 111 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #2 | Bubbleking_Basti | 99 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Benny | 68 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | ChrisS | 62 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Resh | 59 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Benny | +4.23 | 75 | 81 |
| #2 | SMB | +1.90 | 82 | 72 |
| #3 | [G2] Mario ♑ 10 | +1.72 | 88 | 66 |
| #4 | Yunoc | +0.65 | 56 | 46 |
| #5 | NoReturns | +0.57 | 66 | 68 |





