








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 61 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 160 matches | ||
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2135 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,456 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2763 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2871 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2373 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2449 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $603,066 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 118 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hemuli | 59% | 29 |
| #2 | Juju_Asd | 56% | 39 |
| #3 | jakee | 55% | 158 |
| #4 | ⭕⃤Meli | 54% | 48 |
| #5 | Jusa | 50% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hemuli | 59% | 29 |
| #2 | Juju_Asd | 56% | 39 |
| #3 | jakee | 55% | 158 |
| #4 | ⭕⃤Meli | 54% | 48 |
| #5 | Jusa | 50% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jakee | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #2 | ⭕⃤Meli | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Juju_Asd | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jakee | 856 | 0.25 | 25 min |
| #2 | ⭕⃤Meli | 135 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #3 | Juju_Asd | 122 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | Hemuli | 119 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #5 | Jusa | 91 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⭕⃤Meli | +4.63 | 90 | 72 |
| #2 | Hemuli | +1.76 | 74 | 74 |
| #3 | ✪ epi | +0.69 | 62 | 72 |
| #4 | Jusa | +0.59 | 86 | 71 |
| #5 | Juju_Asd | -0.12 | 75 | 65 |





