








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 20 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 182 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2090 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,776 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2576 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2937 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2226 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2037 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $408,411 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kakada | 54% | 56 |
| #2 | CefsInBlack | 50% | 40 |
| #3 | Nido | 47% | 57 |
| #4 | GalIboyS | 46% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kakada | 54% | 56 |
| #2 | CefsInBlack | 50% | 40 |
| #3 | Nido | 47% | 57 |
| #4 | GalIboyS | 46% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nido | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Kakada | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | CefsInBlack | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | GalIboyS | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nido | 221 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #2 | Kakada | 121 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | CefsInBlack | 74 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | GalIboyS | 65 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CefsInBlack | +1.74 | 49 | 76 |
| #2 | Kakada | +1.06 | 58 | 65 |
| #3 | Gardien de la décharge | +0.06 | 64 | 67 |
| #4 | Nido | -1.64 | 48 | 73 |
| #5 | GalIboyS | -3.23 | 37 | 59 |





