








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 673 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 223 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 203 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Premier | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 148 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3933 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,185 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7111 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6708 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 8706 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 5660 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,101,399 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 365 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eXo | 63% | 101 |
| #2 | 𝕭𝖑𝖆𝖈𝖐-𝕯𝖗𝖆𝖌𝖔𝖓𝖎𝖓 | 60% | 67 |
| #3 | Miyotekk | 58% | 52 |
| #4 | Kallemitderkelle | 57% | 178 |
| #5 | E-Sports Jürgen | 56% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 'NoK´ | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | eㄨo | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | DeinFinanzcoach | 4 | 0.0078 |
| #4 | Kallemitderkelle | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Schnelli | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 'NoK´ | 630 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #2 | eㄨo | 523 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #3 | Kallemitderkelle | 309 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | eXo | 205 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | Schnelli | 185 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | E-Sports Jürgen | +2.32 | 84 | 46 |
| #2 | HerrPes | +2.04 | 75 | 83 |
| #3 | eXo | +1.82 | 60 | 89 |
| #4 | Supertoaster | +1.75 | 78 | 47 |
| #5 | equalize87 | +1.75 | 81 | 67 |





