








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 198 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 167 matches | ||
| Premier | 150 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4689 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,217 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5878 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3558 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 4408 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3373 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,792,702 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Creodus | 51% | 208 |
| #2 | Konkeli | 46% | 119 |
| #3 | Naapurin Weirdo | 44% | 282 |
| #4 | NikiMinaj95 | 36% | 238 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Creodus | 51% | 208 |
| #2 | Konkeli | 46% | 119 |
| #3 | Naapurin Weirdo | 44% | 282 |
| #4 | NikiMinaj95 | 36% | 238 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Konkeli | 8 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | Creodus | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | NikiMinaj95 | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Naapurin Weirdo | 3 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Naapurin Weirdo | 286 | 0.05 | 8 min |
| #2 | NikiMinaj95 | 265 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #3 | Konkeli | 211 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #4 | Creodus | 201 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Konkeli | +5.49 | 76 | 64 |
| #2 | Creodus | +2.36 | 79 | 54 |
| #3 | Buf0 | -1.04 | 57 | 62 |
| #4 | Naapurin Weirdo | -1.67 | 23 | 58 |
| #5 | NikiMinaj95 | -5.90 | 16 | 42 |





