








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 357 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 601 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4333 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,421 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2699 | 14% |
| Smokes | 5276 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 8164 | 42% |
| Molotovs | 3282 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $605,125 of utility $39 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 583 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Diva | 44% | 79 |
| #2 | CHRISTINAFKNBMWFRK | 44% | 50 |
| #3 | BLUEвєяяy | 44% | 82 |
| #4 | MashaTriceps | 43% | 46 |
| #5 | Caado | 41% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BLUEвєяяy | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Diva | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | MashaTriceps | 3 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | CHRISTINAFKNBMWFRK | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | p3stLi | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Diva | 176 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | p3stLi | 174 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | BLUEвєяяy | 132 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | DANGY | 127 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | CHRISTINAFKNBMWFRK | 127 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CHRISTINAFKNBMWFRK | +1.64 | 32 | 54 |
| #2 | Caado | +1.19 | 54 | 59 |
| #3 | MashaTriceps | +0.13 | 47 | 65 |
| #4 | Rain | -0.20 | 46 | 70 |
| #5 | BLUEвєяяy | -0.56 | 29 | 58 |





