








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 312 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 126 matches | ||
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2768 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,349 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2455 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2959 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3357 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2578 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $524,647 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 188 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Murrivalo | 55% | 53 |
| #2 | hieroja | 54% | 24 |
| #3 | Heqe | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | seministi | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | vanha_hosuja_:3 | 49% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Heqe | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | seministi | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | vanha_hosuja_:3 | 49% | 51 |
| #6 | nuija | 45% | 20 |
| #7 | imN3O | 43% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | imN3O | 4 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | Murrivalo | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | vanha_hosuja_:3 | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | hieroja | 2 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | Heqe | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Murrivalo | 257 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #2 | vanha_hosuja_:3 | 253 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #3 | imN3O | 143 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #4 | Heqe | 89 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | seministi | 84 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vanha_hosuja_:3 | +2.11 | 78 | 69 |
| #2 | Zerman d(★_★)b | +1.53 | 79 | 71 |
| #3 | imN3O | +1.28 | 78 | 72 |
| #4 | hieroja | +0.15 | 79 | 43 |
| #5 | Heqe | +0.09 | 81 | 64 |





