








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 299 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 274 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3100 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,582 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1527 | 13% |
| Smokes | 3119 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4024 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 2912 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,162,636 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 550 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DANi | 58% | 38 |
| #2 | MutteriBena | 56% | 27 |
| #3 | MuNaKKa | 49% | 35 |
| #4 | ErboneNN | 47% | 58 |
| #5 | Jukiツ | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | MutteriBena | 56% | 27 |
| #3 | MuNaKKa | 49% | 35 |
| #4 | ErboneNN | 47% | 58 |
| #5 | Jukiツ | 43% | 23 |
| #6 | heNe | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | heNe | 4 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | MutteriBena | 2 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | ErboneNN | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | DANi | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ErboneNN | 227 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #2 | heNe | 110 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #3 | DANi | 106 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | MuNaKKa | 28 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Jukiツ | 17 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | heNe | +3.38 | 80 | 59 |
| #2 | DANi | +0.37 | 60 | 59 |
| #3 | MuNaKKa | +0.02 | 48 | 43 |
| #4 | simo | -0.10 | 54 | 59 |
| #5 | ErboneNN | -0.19 | 77 | 70 |





