








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 411 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 121 matches | ||
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2521 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,280 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4614 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3779 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3183 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3704 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $447,636 of utility $74 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 173 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KinGO | 76% | 17 |
| #2 | Henning | 56% | 214 |
| #3 | Anders | 53% | 101 |
| #4 | GELLERT | 52% | 226 |
| #5 | Vester | 51% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Anders | 53% | 101 |
| #4 | GELLERT | 52% | 226 |
| #5 | Vester | 51% | 77 |
| #6 | Birdsong | 50% | 18 |
| #7 | Hjorth | 49% | 129 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GELLERT | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | Henning | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | Hjorth | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | Anders | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | Vester | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GELLERT | 971 | 0.20 | 30 min |
| #2 | Henning | 423 | 0.09 | 13 min |
| #3 | Hjorth | 303 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #4 | Vester | 196 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #5 | Anders | 123 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GELLERT | +0.69 | 67 | 82 |
| #2 | holm | +0.61 | 68 | 77 |
| #3 | Anders | +0.46 | 59 | 67 |
| #4 | Henning | +0.40 | 56 | 74 |
| #5 | Hjorth | +0.01 | 48 | 68 |





