








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 822 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 442 matches | ||
| Faceit | 158 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 105 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4782 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,038 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2563 | 12% |
| Smokes | 5288 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 7782 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 5405 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,175,414 of utility $214 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mobE | 58% | 65 |
| #2 | DrJenner | 58% | 36 |
| #3 | sc1p | 52% | 226 |
| #4 | killa | 52% | 186 |
| #5 | El Giraff | 52% | 286 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Giraff | 11 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Flo | 9 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | Die (mega) FETTE Ricarda Lang | 9 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | killa | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | sc1p | 6 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flo | 1766 | 0.21 | 51 min |
| #2 | sc1p | 707 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #3 | killa | 706 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #4 | El Giraff | 669 | 0.11 | 19 min |
| #5 | Die (mega) FETTE Ricarda Lang | 500 | 0.07 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | taN | +1.75 | 73 | 71 |
| #2 | Flo | +1.35 | 48 | 81 |
| #3 | DrJenner | +1.25 | 58 | 63 |
| #4 | sc1p | +1.16 | 66 | 72 |
| #5 | Die (mega) FETTE Ricarda Lang | +0.73 | 63 | 59 |





