








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 617 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 278 matches | ||
| Wingman | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3540 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,343 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3072 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2334 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 3693 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3244 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,687,688 of utility $200 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1171 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gin | 47% | 242 |
| #2 | Impulse♥ | 47% | 376 |
| #3 | Owned | 47% | 260 |
| #4 | Steph The Beasty | 45% | 186 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gin | 47% | 242 |
| #2 | Impulse♥ | 47% | 376 |
| #3 | Owned | 47% | 260 |
| #4 | Steph The Beasty | 45% | 186 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Impulse♥ | 13 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Owned | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | gin | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Steph The Beasty | 4 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gin | 1537 | 0.30 | 44 min |
| #2 | Owned | 1006 | 0.18 | 28 min |
| #3 | Impulse♥ | 313 | 0.04 | 8 min |
| #4 | Steph The Beasty | 138 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gin | +1.17 | 66 | 75 |
| #2 | M I L E Y | +0.66 | 64 | 69 |
| #3 | Impulse♥ | -0.37 | 64 | 61 |
| #4 | Owned | -0.89 | 49 | 76 |
| #5 | Steph The Beasty | -1.90 | 48 | 60 |





