








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 275 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1076 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,258 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1691 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1386 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 993 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1188 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $240,690 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 48 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | freezeverb | 60% | 50 |
| #2 | Tomb1n0 | 59% | 70 |
| #3 | Danksy | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | Josh :^) | 48% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | freezeverb | 60% | 50 |
| #2 | Tomb1n0 | 59% | 70 |
| #3 | Danksy | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | Josh :^) | 48% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tomb1n0 | 14 | 0.0098 |
| #2 | freezeverb | 4 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Josh :^) | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Danksy | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tomb1n0 | 333 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #2 | Josh :^) | 118 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #3 | freezeverb | 107 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | Danksy | 57 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | freezeverb | +3.13 | 79 | 75 |
| #2 | Tomb1n0 | +0.45 | 83 | 69 |
| #3 | Nut315 | -0.43 | 68 | 67 |
| #4 | Danksy | -0.49 | 52 | 56 |
| #5 | Josh :^) | -0.99 | 50 | 66 |





