








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 264 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1592 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,749 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1150 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1121 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 733 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 745 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $463,159 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 206 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kcaz- | 68% | 31 |
| #2 | SILMÄMIES | 65% | 20 |
| #3 | Loitsu<3 | 63% | 27 |
| #4 | Vuokko | 62% | 21 |
| #5 | Savier [o_o] | 59% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Hjeleen | 50% | 42 |
| #10 | Rokuli | 47% | 83 |
| #11 | Sushi Drive-by | 45% | 11 |
| #12 | cFain | 38% | 16 |
| #13 | lubo | 31% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vuokko | 9 | 0.0215 |
| #2 | Loitsu<3 | 7 | 0.0123 |
| #3 | Rokuli | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | luikuri | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | Shuvit | 4 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | luikuri | 223 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | Shuvit | 170 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | Hjeleen | 130 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | Rokuli | 128 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | Loitsu<3 | 122 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SILMÄMIES | +4.59 | 89 | 64 |
| #2 | Savier [o_o] | +2.33 | 69 | 71 |
| #3 | Loitsu<3 | +1.71 | 64 | 71 |
| #4 | kcaz- | +1.48 | 67 | 68 |
| #5 | luikuri | +0.82 | 75 | 66 |





