








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 33 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 141 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2203 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,877 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1330 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1638 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1598 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1311 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $434,521 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Dragonhawk | 54% | 26 |
| #11 | Beskow | 53% | 17 |
| #12 | fuwaa | 52% | 29 |
| #13 | eXampL | 36% | 14 |
| #14 | ✪v3n0m^ | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Igelkotte. | +2.79 | 71 | 80 |
| #2 | Beskow | +2.64 | 82 | 54 |
| #3 | FEGISEN🐔 | +2.26 | 80 | 62 |
| #4 | (TheRealCatArmy) jockecknocke | +2.09 | 82 | 47 |
| #5 | Dragonhawk | +2.09 | 67 | 69 |





