








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 393 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 283 matches | ||
| Wingman | 144 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 55 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2964 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,243 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4013 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3100 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3341 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3789 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,444,725 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 191 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | F\/ck CS2 | 45% | 130 |
| #10 | Brupin3 | 44% | 133 |
| #11 | Leo | 39% | 54 |
| #12 | «Pjay_caxinas» | 38% | 56 |
| #13 | mystic | 33% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Happy | 5 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | PATAKO_88 | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Dálio Fountaine #Uau | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | «Pjay_caxinas» | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Dalio | 3 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | «Pjay_caxinas» | 286 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #2 | PATAKO_88 | 234 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #3 | F\/ck CS2 | 230 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #4 | Mr. Happy | 226 | 0.28 | 5 min |
| #5 | Leo | 203 | 0.19 | 4 min |





