








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 170 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 53 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1309 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,589 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1303 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1725 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 936 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1625 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $594,217 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 15 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Kropka20 | 57% | 28 |
| #8 | One Eye DooMeh | 55% | 145 |
| #9 | Switchr | 50% | 8 |
| #10 | Grogg Dogg | 27% | 15 |
| #11 | Jbeng | 13% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | decoy | +3.84 | 75 | 68 |
| #2 | Switchr | +3.47 | 65 | 75 |
| #3 | Pr0ject | +2.48 | 89 | 65 |
| #4 | Kropka20 | +2.36 | 69 | 64 |
| #5 | Tjay | +1.30 | 72 | 64 |





