








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
166 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,281 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 290 | 23% |
| Smokes | 402 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 242 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 347 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $129,595 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Superfreak | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | dan4k | 52% | 31 |
| #3 | JustiN` | 45% | 42 |
| #4 | Mig | 34% | 47 |
| #5 | o74769 | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Superfreak | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | dan4k | 52% | 31 |
| #3 | JustiN` | 45% | 42 |
| #4 | Mig | 34% | 47 |
| #5 | o74769 | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mig | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | dan4k | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | JustiN` | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Superfreak | 1 | 0.0122 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JustiN` | 171 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #2 | dan4k | 122 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #3 | Mig | 99 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | o74769 | 71 | 0.36 | 2 min |
| #5 | Superfreak | 23 | 0.28 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JustiN` | +6.65 | 88 | 70 |
| #2 | Superfreak | +5.70 | 83 | 76 |
| #3 | o74769 | +1.76 | 45 | 83 |
| #4 | dan4k | -0.29 | 55 | 66 |
| #5 | Mig | -1.16 | 30 | 57 |





