










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 44 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
364 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,173 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 366 | 31% |
| Smokes | 355 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 176 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 276 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $114,194 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 威士忌酒 | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | d3v0 | 100% | 3 |
| #3 | driz0000R'3RD" | 100% | 3 |
| #4 | falco* | 86% | 7 |
| #5 | natsu | 73% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | Monkey D. JulAR | 50% | 4 |
| #15 | maouuu | 43% | 7 |
| #16 | 迪拜 GEARGANN | 33% | 3 |
| #17 | Ry0^ guigui | 33% | 3 |
| #18 | RaiseN | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RaZ | 2 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | d3v0 | 2 | 0.0370 |
| #3 | jkz, | 1 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | natsu | 69 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #2 | RaZ | 64 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #3 | jkz, | 54 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | fuRy | 27 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Monkey D. JulAR | 24 | 0.26 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 威士忌酒 | +7.82 | 73 | 93 |
| #2 | kUtA | +4.77 | 64 | 76 |
| #3 | Sixer | +4.15 | 93 | 62 |
| #4 | driz0000R'3RD" | +2.52 | 81 | 86 |
| #5 | maouuu | +2.28 | 78 | 77 |





