








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 102 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 90 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1150 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,547 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1255 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1423 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1649 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1220 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $275,079 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 132 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rarara | 61% | 23 |
| #2 | DaWee | 58% | 90 |
| #3 | DrieX | 56% | 54 |
| #4 | r- | 51% | 67 |
| #5 | xyz. | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rarara | 61% | 23 |
| #2 | DaWee | 58% | 90 |
| #3 | DrieX | 56% | 54 |
| #4 | r- | 51% | 67 |
| #5 | xyz. | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DaWee | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | DrieX | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | r- | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | r- | 191 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #2 | DaWee | 153 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #3 | DrieX | 135 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | rarara | 59 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | xyz. | 17 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [S]milein0_ | +2.39 | 61 | 63 |
| #2 | rarara | +0.79 | 53 | 68 |
| #3 | DaWee | +0.65 | 77 | 61 |
| #4 | xyz. | +0.03 | 68 | 69 |
| #5 | r- | -0.55 | 63 | 67 |





