








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 875 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 101 matches | ||
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4749 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,774 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4670 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3911 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2973 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3220 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $939,173 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 499 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | haze | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | the fuckin robot aim | 61% | 59 |
| #3 | Drip Chicken | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | Reiko | 59% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | haze | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | the fuckin robot aim | 61% | 59 |
| #3 | Drip Chicken | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | Reiko | 59% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | the fuckin robot aim | 7 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | haze | 3 | 0.0073 |
| #3 | Drip Chicken | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | the fuckin robot aim | 166 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #2 | haze | 88 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #3 | Drip Chicken | 46 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Reiko | 39 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rizz | +4.40 | 91 | 73 |
| #2 | Drip Chicken | +2.44 | 78 | 57 |
| #3 | the fuckin robot aim | +1.71 | 80 | 65 |
| #4 | haze | +1.13 | 73 | 67 |
| #5 | Reiko | -2.66 | 65 | 55 |





