








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 192 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1399 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,812 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1367 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1291 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1038 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1116 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $308,170 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GonskiEZ | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | Teng | 71% | 24 |
| #3 | ✪ JON BONES JONES | 63% | 8 |
| #4 | Москва | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | SeaBo* | 61% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SeaBo* | 3 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | sMacK tAlK# | 2 | 0.0075 |
| #3 | 2iq | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | ZERO | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | ✪ Kobe Bryant.™ | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SeaBo* | 170 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #2 | ZERO | 66 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | Teng | 64 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | 2iq | 56 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | deaNos | 46 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SeaBo* | +2.64 | 76 | 70 |
| #2 | ♔ [G]™ ☣ | +2.33 | 82 | 71 |
| #3 | GonskiEZ | +1.09 | 64 | 59 |
| #4 | ZERO | +0.13 | 64 | 73 |
| #5 | Stevie2Kerr | -0.04 | 67 | 73 |





