










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 565 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 388 matches | ||
| Faceit | 130 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5229 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,396 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4958 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6048 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 4866 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2524 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,909,932 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 821 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | garrettawesome41 | 54% | 101 |
| #2 | tum tum | 52% | 86 |
| #3 | DI24X | 50% | 54 |
| #4 | DMMONEYY | 33% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | garrettawesome41 | 54% | 101 |
| #2 | tum tum | 52% | 86 |
| #3 | DI24X | 50% | 54 |
| #4 | DMMONEYY | 33% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DI24X | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | garrettawesome41 | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | tum tum | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | DMMONEYY | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tum tum | 368 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #2 | garrettawesome41 | 306 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | DI24X | 179 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | DMMONEYY | 116 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | garrettawesome41 | +2.01 | 83 | 58 |
| #2 | DMMONEYY | +0.03 | 84 | 62 |
| #3 | tum tum | +0.00 | 56 | 62 |
| #4 | socrates | -0.13 | 67 | 67 |
| #5 | DI24X | -3.06 | 26 | 49 |





