








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 514 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 154 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2261 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,031 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1090 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2927 | 42% |
| HE Grenades | 1378 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1636 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,311,577 of utility $234 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 228 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hom3r | 54% | 24 |
| #2 | Mathias | 50% | 102 |
| #3 | ✪︎ GUFL3 ✪ | 46% | 46 |
| #4 | Snuxsnux | 44% | 27 |
| #5 | Jeyk | 39% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Snuxsnux | 44% | 27 |
| #5 | Jeyk | 39% | 23 |
| #6 | NPetersen | 38% | 61 |
| #7 | IceColdC | 32% | 19 |
| #8 | caja | 19% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NPetersen | 5 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | Snuxsnux | 4 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | ✪︎ GUFL3 ✪ | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | IceColdC | 2 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | Mathias | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NPetersen | 109 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #2 | ✪︎ GUFL3 ✪ | 76 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | Jeyk | 50 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | IceColdC | 41 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Snuxsnux | 26 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NPetersen | +2.64 | 64 | 42 |
| #2 | Hom3r | +1.71 | 64 | 49 |
| #3 | Lilbror | +1.06 | 62 | 58 |
| #4 | IceColdC | +0.05 | 64 | 69 |
| #5 | Mathias | -0.93 | 47 | 14 |





