








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 837 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 346 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Wingman | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 61 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4233 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,438 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3972 | 22% |
| Smokes | 5571 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4990 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3905 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,002,884 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 89 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grizwitz | 61% | 88 |
| #2 | Sarijin | 56% | 52 |
| #3 | gorkraaF | 54% | 357 |
| #4 | PoTT | 53% | 125 |
| #5 | aLk' | 53% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grizwitz | 61% | 88 |
| #2 | Sarijin | 56% | 52 |
| #3 | gorkraaF | 54% | 357 |
| #4 | PoTT | 53% | 125 |
| #5 | aLk' | 53% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gorkraaF | 11 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | aLk' | 4 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | Grizwitz | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gorkraaF | 638 | 0.09 | 17 min |
| #2 | aLk' | 122 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | Grizwitz | 118 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | PoTT | 101 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #5 | Sarijin | 55 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grizwitz | +3.01 | 60 | 59 |
| #2 | Kennedine | +0.98 | 58 | 71 |
| #3 | gorkraaF | +0.38 | 56 | 60 |
| #4 | aLk' | -0.67 | 46 | 63 |
| #5 | PoTT | -2.47 | 21 | 52 |





