








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 595 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 122 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1368 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,381 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1596 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1885 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 833 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1067 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $496,762 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 140 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sh0ut | 85% | 26 |
| #2 | HenningHS | 64% | 92 |
| #3 | xlo | 63% | 109 |
| #4 | arkin | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | BR1X | 63% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HenningHS | 3 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sh0ut | +2.61 | 78 | 57 |
| #2 | BR1X | +1.59 | 84 | 46 |
| #3 | xlo | +1.51 | 74 | 66 |
| #4 | dD-.- | +1.23 | 62 | 77 |
| #5 | Rejin[9] | +0.84 | 70 | 73 |





