








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 670 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 674 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6696 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,854 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3835 | 18% |
| Smokes | 4772 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 8097 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 4150 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,653,129 of utility $212 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 188 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | begga11 | 58% | 45 |
| #2 | kRIZZy | 54% | 68 |
| #3 | HOPE | 51% | 59 |
| #4 | #bebe | 51% | 65 |
| #5 | C H A R L I E L I E L I E L I E | 50% | 135 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | .noname sn1tch | 46% | 76 |
| #14 | Jay✨ | 45% | 288 |
| #15 | pietze | 43% | 46 |
| #16 | Blokk | 42% | 248 |
| #17 | xLpTx ♘ | 42% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blokk | 12 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | .Dob` | 7 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | ңekĻaЯ | 6 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Pse♿Ɑ͞ ̶ﻝ | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Jay✨ | 5 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ңekĻaЯ | 994 | 0.14 | 25 min |
| #2 | Jay✨ | 714 | 0.11 | 16 min |
| #3 | .Dob` | 511 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| #4 | Blokk | 358 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #5 | C H A R L I E L I E L I E L I E | 291 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C H A R L I E L I E L I E L I E | +2.48 | 61 | 70 |
| #2 | ңekĻaЯ | +2.40 | 74 | 73 |
| #3 | #bebe | +1.24 | 77 | 65 |
| #4 | Pse♿Ɑ͞ ̶ﻝ | +1.05 | 80 | 62 |
| #5 | begga11 | +0.55 | 45 | 71 |





