








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 641 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 249 matches | ||
| Faceit | 169 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4867 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,633 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6894 | 29% |
| Smokes | 6404 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5098 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5237 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,140,932 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1184 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | robby1 | 64% | 45 |
| #2 | obg | 60% | 35 |
| #3 | decko | 60% | 57 |
| #4 | nadr0 | 59% | 41 |
| #5 | levy | 54% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | nadr0 | 59% | 41 |
| #5 | levy | 54% | 35 |
| #6 | MeatBat | 53% | 32 |
| #7 | akin | 53% | 162 |
| #8 | sherps | 50% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | akin | 8 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | robby1 | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | sherps | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | nadr0 | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | levy | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | akin | 597 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #2 | robby1 | 242 | 0.26 | 7 min |
| #3 | sherps | 204 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | nadr0 | 191 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #5 | levy | 190 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | robby1 | +4.51 | 91 | 75 |
| #2 | decko | +3.02 | 87 | 56 |
| #3 | sherps | +2.40 | 84 | 59 |
| #4 | levy | +2.20 | 58 | 77 |
| #5 | damms | +0.42 | 64 | 68 |





