








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
539 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,339 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 385 | 16% |
| Smokes | 418 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 742 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 794 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $176,208 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xgamer | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | nevski | 55% | 40 |
| #3 | `Struggles | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | wARD | 47% | 17 |
| #5 | kinson | 44% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Zabba | 41% | 44 |
| #7 | storm | 38% | 21 |
| #8 | Game Genie-^- | 36% | 36 |
| #9 | RyanDabbleU | 33% | 9 |
| #10 | Emyt | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kinson | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | wARD | 2 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | Zabba | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | nevski | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | Emyt | 1 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nevski | 176 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #2 | Game Genie-^- | 117 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | Zabba | 113 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | kinson | 104 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | wARD | 55 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nevski | +4.98 | 86 | 90 |
| #2 | wARD | +3.16 | 83 | 66 |
| #3 | Game Genie-^- | +2.54 | 66 | 73 |
| #4 | `Struggles | +0.47 | 51 | 86 |
| #5 | storm | +0.44 | 53 | 71 |





