








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 771 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 984 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10321 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,326 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5656 | 21% |
| Smokes | 6787 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 9236 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 5647 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,318,868 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1169 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝔟𝔩𝔬𝔯𝔤 | 53% | 74 |
| #2 | Irwin | 49% | 171 |
| #3 | Nokkava | 40% | 99 |
| #4 | Crusifer | 40% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝔟𝔩𝔬𝔯𝔤 | 53% | 74 |
| #2 | Irwin | 49% | 171 |
| #3 | Nokkava | 40% | 99 |
| #4 | Crusifer | 40% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Irwin | 17 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | Nokkava | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | 𝔟𝔩𝔬𝔯𝔤 | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Crusifer | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Irwin | 530 | 0.15 | 17 min |
| #2 | Nokkava | 194 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #3 | Crusifer | 132 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | 𝔟𝔩𝔬𝔯𝔤 | 90 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nokkava | +1.69 | 85 | 64 |
| #2 | Crusifer | +1.04 | 62 | 67 |
| #3 | Irwin | +0.66 | 58 | 72 |
| #4 | Norphe | -1.33 | 50 | 51 |
| #5 | 𝔟𝔩𝔬𝔯𝔤 | -2.07 | 59 | 59 |





