








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 414 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 130 matches | ||
| Premier | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2235 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,317 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2389 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2725 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1925 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2278 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $563,158 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | ControL | 50% | 18 |
| #14 | _Redlock | 50% | 58 |
| #15 | Ltd_Ford | 39% | 38 |
| #16 | Staubi | 31% | 13 |
| #17 | IndydaRuler | 19% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _Redlock | 6 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | greeny | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | KulliC | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | deltaaa | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #5 | KANTiNHO '9 | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deltaaa | 459 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #2 | Nova | 165 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | KANTiNHO '9 | 117 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | zkk ✈ | 93 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Eriis | 86 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .bongdude | +3.70 | 82 | 66 |
| #2 | flow | +2.88 | 69 | 77 |
| #3 | deltaaa | +2.53 | 68 | 72 |
| #4 | _Redlock | +2.43 | 48 | 50 |
| #5 | zkk ✈ | +1.41 | 81 | 61 |





