








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1099 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 169 matches | ||
| Esplay | 82 matches | 1,840 | |
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3264 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,209 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4160 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2833 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3130 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2086 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,130,028 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1156 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | korreWorre | 55% | 178 |
| #2 | Qslig | 53% | 200 |
| #3 | The stekspade | 48% | 116 |
| #4 | badh | 42% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | korreWorre | 55% | 178 |
| #2 | Qslig | 53% | 200 |
| #3 | The stekspade | 48% | 116 |
| #4 | badh | 42% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qslig | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | korreWorre | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | The stekspade | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | badh | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | korreWorre | 430 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #2 | The stekspade | 264 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | Qslig | 215 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #4 | badh | 92 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qslig | +0.87 | 68 | 64 |
| #2 | The stekspade | +0.40 | 72 | 59 |
| #3 | headshot man | +0.21 | 68 | 73 |
| #4 | korreWorre | -0.01 | 51 | 66 |
| #5 | badh | -0.56 | 76 | 67 |





