








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 893 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 238 matches | ||
| Premier | 141 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4191 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,705 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 280 | 4% |
| Smokes | 2479 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 2684 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 1262 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,801,587 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 108 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Wolfie | 48% | 75 |
| #4 | Krisout | 46% | 37 |
| #5 | *aAa* ROCCO | 43% | 182 |
| #6 | ♥-Miaou-♥ | 41% | 248 |
| #7 | Frogolo | 34% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | *aAa* ROCCO | 430 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #2 | ♥-Miaou-♥ | 210 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #3 | Krisout | 154 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | Frogolo | 102 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | Wolfie | 91 | 0.06 | 3 min |





