








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 175 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 187 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2406 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,048 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3204 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2751 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3484 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2609 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $771,075 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 51 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | dOG.Fisherman | 52% | 101 |
| #6 | ELTO | 52% | 165 |
| 52% | 25 | ||
| 52% | 291 | ||
| #9 | Lux | 48% | 178 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lux | 5 | 0.0014 |
| 3 | 0.0005 | ||
| #3 | ELTO | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | b4m | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | dOG.Fisherman | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ELTO | 488 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| 457 | 0.08 | 15 min | ||
| #3 | dOG.Fisherman | 271 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #4 | Lux | 247 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| 231 | 0.14 | 6 min |





