








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 4 different maps




Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
247 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 584 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 150 | 26% |
| Smokes | 193 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 130 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 111 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $84,401 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rocksTaa | 61% | 23 |
| #2 | STTEEPPHHAAN | 60% | 20 |
| #3 | macman | 58% | 24 |
| #4 | SteffenX | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | FRESHREFLEX | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rocksTaa | 61% | 23 |
| #2 | STTEEPPHHAAN | 60% | 20 |
| #3 | macman | 58% | 24 |
| #4 | SteffenX | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | FRESHREFLEX | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | macman | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SteffenX | 108 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #2 | STTEEPPHHAAN | 48 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | rocksTaa | 47 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | macman | 26 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | FRESHREFLEX | 13 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | STTEEPPHHAAN | +2.74 | 59 | 74 |
| #2 | rocksTaa | +1.42 | 64 | 67 |
| #3 | MooN | +0.92 | 74 | 62 |
| #4 | macman | +0.62 | 21 | 60 |
| #5 | SteffenX | -2.13 | 51 | 85 |





