








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 93 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1366 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,654 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1688 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2153 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1366 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1447 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $574,235 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 89 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | flamie | 42% | 88 |
| #7 | DeadShoT✇/_\✇ | 41% | 51 |
| #8 | ShadowDemon | 41% | 120 |
| #9 | banaangamer | 41% | 96 |
| #10 | BoO YaH! | 39% | 147 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BoO YaH! | 6 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | ShadowDemon | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | banaangamer | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | stupid1ty | 3 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BoO YaH! | 315 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #2 | ShadowDemon | 239 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | stupid1ty | 101 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | DeadShoT✇/_\✇ | 86 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | banaangamer | 82 | 0.04 | 2 min |





