








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1397 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 729 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 88 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8211 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 47,430 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 14407 | 30% |
| Smokes | 12134 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 10786 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 10103 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,999,931 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 291 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [kamikaze] | 53% | 133 |
| #2 | ✪ NookieSTAR | 51% | 176 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [kamikaze] | 53% | 133 |
| #2 | ✪ NookieSTAR | 51% | 176 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [kamikaze] | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | ✪ NookieSTAR | 6 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ NookieSTAR | 503 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| #2 | [kamikaze] | 384 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [kamikaze] | +0.33 | 72 | 58 |
| #2 | doMi | +0.32 | 72 | 78 |
| #3 | ✪ NookieSTAR | -0.64 | 48 | 72 |





