








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 944 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2912 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,399 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1436 | 33% |
| Smokes | 958 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 934 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1071 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,095,424 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1593 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴍ𝖎𝖓𝖝𝖈 | 45% | 114 |
| #2 | CapDoe | 43% | 46 |
| #3 | str3ps1ls | 24% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴍ𝖎𝖓𝖝𝖈 | 45% | 114 |
| #2 | CapDoe | 43% | 46 |
| #3 | str3ps1ls | 24% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴍ𝖎𝖓𝖝𝖈 | 21 | 0.0102 |
| #2 | CapDoe | 20 | 0.0236 |
| #3 | str3ps1ls | 5 | 0.0163 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CapDoe | 173 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #2 | ᴍ𝖎𝖓𝖝𝖈 | 66 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #3 | str3ps1ls | 45 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lxzz | +0.17 | 49 | 34 |
| #2 | CapDoe | -0.09 | 17 | 17 |
| #3 | ᴍ𝖎𝖓𝖝𝖈 | -2.51 | 65 | 22 |
| #4 | str3ps1ls | -4.41 | 44 | 18 |





