










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 678 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 60 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1436 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,970 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2686 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2279 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2193 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2812 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $949,846 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 345 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sparky | 54% | 138 |
| #2 | Barra fuel injector | 53% | 40 |
| #3 | BruceRee | 51% | 215 |
| #4 | ACHILLES | 49% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sparky | 54% | 138 |
| #2 | Barra fuel injector | 53% | 40 |
| #3 | BruceRee | 51% | 215 |
| #4 | ACHILLES | 49% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BruceRee | 22 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Sparky | 10 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | ACHILLES | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Barra fuel injector | 2 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BruceRee | 373 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #2 | Sparky | 249 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #3 | ACHILLES | 147 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | Barra fuel injector | 57 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ACHILLES | +3.23 | 60 | 62 |
| #2 | Sparky | +2.93 | 68 | 53 |
| #3 | Barra fuel injector | +2.41 | 73 | 34 |
| #4 | BruceRee | +0.25 | 37 | 55 |
| #5 | Jetree | -2.39 | 46 | 53 |





