








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1255 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 135 matches | ||
| Wingman | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




44 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1929 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,690 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2184 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2677 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1890 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1939 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $653,843 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 757 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sanguinius | 56% | 27 |
| #2 | Linhtitomi | 51% | 171 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sanguinius | 56% | 27 |
| #2 | Linhtitomi | 51% | 171 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Linhtitomi | 27 | 0.0091 |
| #2 | Sanguinius | 2 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Linhtitomi | 483 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #2 | Sanguinius | 128 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dexter Morgan | +2.50 | 54 | 63 |
| #2 | Sanguinius | +1.68 | 42 | 45 |
| #3 | Linhtitomi | +0.03 | 27 | 62 |





