








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 182 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1103 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,876 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1075 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1148 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 805 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 848 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $278,454 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 549 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chase | 70% | 20 |
| #2 | dylybear | 68% | 41 |
| #3 | JesusisKing | 64% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chase | 70% | 20 |
| #2 | dylybear | 68% | 41 |
| #3 | JesusisKing | 64% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dylybear | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chase | 115 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #2 | dylybear | 100 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | JesusisKing | 51 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JesusisKing | +3.83 | 66 | 71 |
| #2 | Diaz | +2.38 | 59 | 62 |
| #3 | dylybear | -0.36 | 68 | 55 |
| #4 | Chase | -0.37 | 47 | 61 |





