










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 143 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2564 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 555 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 133 | 24% |
| Smokes | 59 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 192 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 171 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $337,568 of utility $76 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 158 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rain | 9 | 0.0195 |
| #2 | nepo baby | 5 | 0.0155 |
| #3 | 𝗣𝗬𝗥𝗫 | Ye | 5 | 0.0199 |
| #4 | fear | 5 | 0.0233 |
| #5 | No$ia | 4 | 0.0119 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rain | 79 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #2 | No$ia | 32 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #3 | nepo baby | 24 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | copschmerzen | 17 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | end | 11 | 0.05 | 0 min |





