








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 211 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 250 matches | ||
| Wingman | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3986 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,743 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1864 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1364 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1439 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1076 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,167,821 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 32 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Orri | 46% | 263 |
| #2 | Tintti(ᵔᴥᵔ) | 42% | 43 |
| #3 | bigjalo | 41% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Orri | 46% | 263 |
| #2 | Tintti(ᵔᴥᵔ) | 42% | 43 |
| #3 | bigjalo | 41% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Orri | 9 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | bigjalo | 9 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | Tintti(ᵔᴥᵔ) | 3 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Orri | 142 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #2 | bigjalo | 130 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #3 | Tintti(ᵔᴥᵔ) | 102 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skinari | +3.81 | 55 | 33 |
| #2 | Tintti(ᵔᴥᵔ) | -3.03 | 26 | 42 |
| #3 | Orri | -3.30 | 24 | 28 |
| #4 | bigjalo | -5.56 | 20 | 30 |





