








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 946 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 110 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2541 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,962 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1034 | 26% |
| Smokes | 736 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1164 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1028 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,067,222 of utility $276 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 716 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UwU | 73% | 15 |
| #2 | tutu | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | Elleberett | 64% | 44 |
| #4 | PISS_JUGG_97 | 58% | 74 |
| #5 | uncle ßatan | 54% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PISS_JUGG_97 | 123 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #2 | Krypto | 99 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | Elepant | 89 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #4 | tutu | 41 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #5 | that guy | 31 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tutu | +4.87 | 82 | 38 |
| #2 | Goblin Machine | +4.63 | 71 | 46 |
| #3 | Elepant | +4.30 | 63 | 68 |
| #4 | Braampels | +3.74 | 79 | 55 |
| #5 | UwU | +2.92 | 70 | 21 |





