








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 465 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 443 matches | ||
| Wingman | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3219 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,114 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3845 | 16% |
| Smokes | 5010 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 6734 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 8525 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,273,578 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 577 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TrueSchleiche | 10 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Sh4p3 | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | chrism53 | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Showtime Brother /// M Power | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | RealSchleiche | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TrueSchleiche | 192 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #2 | chrism53 | 179 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | Sh4p3 | 148 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #4 | Showtime Brother /// M Power | 99 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | RealSchleiche | 61 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RealSchleiche | +3.84 | 83 | 52 |
| #2 | TrueSchleiche | +1.78 | 59 | 44 |
| #3 | chrism53 | +1.65 | 42 | 56 |
| #4 | Bazinga | -0.53 | 65 | 52 |
| #5 | Vodka-Lemon | -0.99 | 22 | 60 |





