








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 261 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 333 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2203 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,596 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3535 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4912 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5155 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4994 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $527,176 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 63 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <----Someday | 47% | 161 |
| #2 | Siviili | 44% | 52 |
| #3 | ei mul oo avaimii | 41% | 41 |
| #4 | S4n3 | 38% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <----Someday | 47% | 161 |
| #2 | Siviili | 44% | 52 |
| #3 | ei mul oo avaimii | 41% | 41 |
| #4 | S4n3 | 38% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <----Someday | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | S4n3 | 6 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | Siviili | 2 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <----Someday | 501 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #2 | ei mul oo avaimii | 181 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #3 | Siviili | 101 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | S4n3 | 59 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ei mul oo avaimii | +0.70 | 69 | 53 |
| #2 | <----Someday | +0.70 | 33 | 70 |
| #3 | Siviili | -1.07 | 24 | 53 |
| #4 | Svetlana Bukkake | -1.23 | 18 | 69 |
| #5 | S4n3 | -2.91 | 34 | 49 |





