








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 293 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 712 matches | ||
| Wingman | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




169 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7292 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,768 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 16715 | 44% |
| Smokes | 12029 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 5325 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 3699 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,546,773 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 640 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sir Diddy | 59% | 188 |
| #2 | ๋mr m | 55% | 98 |
| #3 | Turid | 49% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sir Diddy | 59% | 188 |
| #2 | ๋mr m | 55% | 98 |
| #3 | Turid | 49% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sir Diddy | 29 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | Turid | 18 | 0.0081 |
| #3 | ๋mr m | 14 | 0.0071 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ๋mr m | 518 | 0.26 | 10 min |
| #2 | Sir Diddy | 299 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #3 | Turid | 60 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ๋mr m | +4.28 | 77 | 61 |
| #2 | Sir Diddy | +3.74 | 68 | 51 |
| #3 | ✪ Tarzan ✪ | +0.65 | 41 | 58 |
| #4 | Turid | -3.04 | 40 | 20 |





