








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1661 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 430 matches | ||
| Wingman | 156 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4813 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,494 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1784 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3989 | 42% |
| HE Grenades | 1550 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2171 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,561,284 of utility $205 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 853 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mini | 65% | 34 |
| #2 | Frogilainen | 62% | 55 |
| #3 | BemariiMiesツ | 47% | 36 |
| #4 | Krax | 45% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mini | 65% | 34 |
| #2 | Frogilainen | 62% | 55 |
| #3 | BemariiMiesツ | 47% | 36 |
| #4 | Krax | 45% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Krax | 6 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Frogilainen | 5 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | BemariiMiesツ | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Mini | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Krax | 262 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | Mini | 166 | 0.28 | 4 min |
| #3 | Frogilainen | 76 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | BemariiMiesツ | 47 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mini | +5.19 | 74 | 70 |
| #2 | Krax | +1.71 | 69 | 61 |
| #3 | TUCO SALAMANCA | +1.38 | 69 | 36 |
| #4 | BemariiMiesツ | +0.87 | 77 | 48 |
| #5 | Frogilainen | -1.71 | 26 | 50 |





